A part of me always longs

For something… I don’t know. 

Shall I do this,

Where do I go,

When will I begin,

And if I decide, how will it last?

Not a high salary

Nor attention from people, 

Even online games that addicted so many

Or binge watching a series or movies, 

Nothing seems to contain me. 

An 8-hour job maybe, 

Long meetings where I feel sleepy, 

That unspoken strictness of dad, 

It seemed to have mellowed over time. 

Or the masculine, polygamic rules

that runs in my blood

Still, not one of those can string me. 

Let me be,

Learn guitar or piano, 

Sing a rock song, novelty or K-pop with falsetto.

Shave my head or grow it long, 

Be sick and take my leave, 

Then go somewhere with no plan

To the nearest beach, 

Book an expensive flight

To Boracay, Sorsogon or Bantayan

Do these whenever I want…relentlessly.

Then I’ll come home to my senses,

Taken every liberating and recharging experiences with me. 

Longing for a hug from mommy, 

An expensive “men of few words” talk with daddy, 

Catch up chats with sissies, 

And “bleh” sessions with bunsos. 

At home with people with pure intentions,

Who give advise then let me be.